"With the chance I've been given I'm gonna be driven as hell..."

I am now back in Florida after a very rigorous yet rewarding five weeks of my life at Chicago Institute. I am so happy and proud to have been one of the 600 corps members at the charter Institute in Chicago and will use that experience to guide me into the next chapter of my TFA life- teaching first grade in my own classroom in Charlotte.

Institute was very helpful and definitely prepared me for certain aspects of being a teacher but I'm nervous as hell to be on my own, using the state standards, curriculum books, my own behavior and mastery tracking systems and just being in charge of possibly 22+ 6 year olds. My sister and aunt have been wonderful in aiding me in the transition from college student to new teacher. My sister has provided me with an array of books, math manipulatives, bulletin board boarder, graphic organizers and so much more. I'm so lucky to have such supportive family members and friends who care about me during this experience.

I permanently move to Charlotte on Tuesday and it really hasn't hit me that I'm moving to a new city with no one except my TFA friends. I'm packing my little SUV with as much as I can fit in it and am even contemplating leaving my own belongings behind to take my new teacher supplies. I have my apartment which is so great so these next few weeks will be all about putting together my new home. My mom is driving up with me to help me get situated and adjusted to Charlotte.

Reflecting on the past five weeks, I'm proud to say that all of my students improved in math and 4 advanced on their DRA tests (reading tests). Not only my students grew, but I grew and learned so much about myself and the new profession I am about to immerse myself in.

First, I learned that every day is a new day. Hell, every hour is a new hour. Kids are weird and they change and one minute they are happy and one minute they are mad at you for writing the wrong thing on the board. Just because something can go wrong on Thursday doesn't mean Friday you can't wipe the slate clean and make an impact. I learned to have a plan for everything. Everything. Absolutely everything. Alyssa, the non-planner, go with the flow girl you used to know, has become a planner. Lesson plans, bathroom procedures, how to handle books plans. Lastly, I learned to be reflective. I've never really been the person to think about my actions or think back on what happened and how I can move forward. This experience has taught me not only how to reflect but how important it is. If a lesson plan doesn't work, I need to think of why and how I can move forward. I need to reflect on the different needs of my students such as how they learn and what their lives are like. I'm so finally appreciative of this new found "skill" because of its importance for my development as a teacher.

Off to pack, relax, and reflect. :)

"But I believe in whatever you do and I'll do anything to see it through..."

I haven't blogged in a while and I regret it but I'm going to do my best to catch up.

These past five weeks have been crazy. They have had ups and downs and extreme lows and extreme highs. I've been so busy and not just busy work busy, but busy with a task, a job that is completely new to me. I've been doing well, or so I think, but there's always room for an improvement. Some days I went into the classroom completely confident, only to have my lesson fall flat on my face. They say if they're not learning, you're not teaching. Makes me wonder what I've been doing some days.

I have 10 wonderful students at Webster Elementary on the west side of Chicago who deserve everything in the world. They may behave below par, not understand subtraction, say "cheer it up" when I said "tier it up" but they are students and scholars who deserve the best education in the world. I have built relationships with my students and genuinely care about their well being. I had some students who didn't get any sleep at night, who had tummy aches from not eating, but they didn't let it effect their education which really says a lot. It's weird to know that in 2 days, I'll be saying goodbye and leaving them at Webster, maybe never hearing from them again.

On the bright side, I was placed as a first grade teacher at Windsor Park Elementary in Charlotte and I couldn't be more excited. I finally have students. I have a classroom. I have coworkers. This whole experience that was once such a distant thought is such a reality and I'm living it completely. I love the Charlotte Corps and the people I have been lucky enough to become close with. Although we've been together for only 6 short weeks, we have clung to each other during Institute and been through the experience together. I feel like when we go back to our region, we will be just as strong.

I'm really sad to leave Chicago. I love this city and I wish I had put it higher up on my region preference list. I'm sad to leave my sister and her family because for once we lived in the same state. I'm sad to leave the Chicago corps members I got so close to at Webster and Melody. Such great teachers and now great friends. I'm sad to leave someone I got close to while I was here who showed me the best side of Chicago. I feel like for the past 2 months, all I've been doing is saying goodbye. Goodbye to Orlando and my best friends there. Saying goodbye to Naples and my loving family. Now saying goodbye to the best in Chicago.

To end this on a happier note, I got two notes from my students today and while they are not indicative of our whole experience here, I love their words and will keep these forever.

Note 1: "Dear Ms. Marder. You is my favorite person. You could be my sister."

Note 2: "Dear Ms. Marder. You're my 1+++ teacher."